Monday, August 04, 2008

A Closer Look At... The Best Television Detective

Have I been plagiarized in advance? According to noted physicist Michio Kaku, such a thing is possible; Michio Kaku believes that time travel to the past, but not the future, is possible. He's wrong about that, of course, but he believes it's possible, and if he believes it's possible then it's also possible that someone read my blog, then traveled into the past, and wrote a murder mystery stealing my ideas in advance.

See, when I wrote about The Best Television Detective, I mentioned that one possible plotline I'd developed was one in which the detective was investigating a murder, all the while not realizing that he/she is, in fact, the murderer!

Then, loyal reader Dorothy H. told me this:

Your idea about a storyline of an investigator, investigating a murder, while he, himself is the murderer, but does not know it, has already been done. David McCullough starred as the multiple-personalitied, investigator who was trying to solve the murder mystery.

So I did my usual investigation (I googled the phrase "investigator multiple personalities David investigator is the killer") and came up with nothing.

Then I checked "IMDB," where I tried to search for "David McCullough," only to learn that there are six different David McCulloughs-- but I still couldn't find this movie Dorothy was talking about.

It's obvious to me what happened: David McCullough, heedless of the consequences, read The Best of Everything, then stole my idea, traveled back in time (with Michio Kaku's help? Maybe...) and created a hit TV show based on that idea.

But he didn't foresee that doing that would have unimaginable effects on the space-time continuum, including creating a world (ours) where there are multiple David McCulloughs running around starring in things. And, probably, a world where Hitler won World War II. I swear, everytime someone messes around with the space-time continuum, they create yet another world where Hitler won World War II. So to the people living in that world, blame David McCullough, not me.

Also, David McCullough, I'll expect royalties on that show, compounded over thirty years. Make sure you use money that's legal tender in this world, you universe-shifting idea stealer.

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Thinking The Lions is the only website where you can find out why Velociraptors are fake, learn how to play "Cloverfield," and otherwise follow the hilarious adventures of a guy with a lot of kids, a lot of love of 70s music, a lot of time to watch Battlestar Galactica, and a very patient wife. Life, only funnier.

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