Thursday, March 22, 2012

Here's who you all really want to see on your team, if you're being honest. (The 5 Best Looking NFL Players, According To Other People)

So Peyton Manning's going to suck the life out of the Denver Broncos, while Tim Tebow will now make Mark Sanchez nervous on two fronts -- reminding him that there's a backup QB to take over when Sanchez's 2012 season again lives up to his rank as the 31st worst quarterback in the NFL, and reminding Sanchez that it's not cool to date 17 year olds.

And that's NFL Free Agency for you these days. Don't worry; this isn't a post about sports, per se, as I am not very knowledgeable about sports and not sure what per se means. (I think it's a mixed drink.) This is a post where I give something to those people who are tired of seeing pictures of January Jones in lingerie on this blog. So to you people, I give you The 5 NFL Players Deemed The Best Looking By Other People:

Will Demps: Voted just above Tom Brady as a "Body Bonus!!! Sexy Man Beast" by NFL Injury.
(Exclamation points in the original.)

Don't worry, Tom...

... you still get in here, as number one on "The Richest". Why? I'll quote it verbatim:

"Tom Brady may be the best looking player NFL player on most lists. Why? Brady has a dating resume that includes actress Bridget Moynahan and model Gisele Bundchen."
Yes, that does make him very good looking.

Then there's

Troy Polamalu: in January, 2011, Bleacher Report voted him #1 hottest and said "Troy Polamalu's hair is insured for $1 million by Head and Shoulders. Need I say more?"

Maybe. I'm not sure what criteria you are all using for this hotness, here. Expensive hair and supermodel dates are, I think, indirect proof of hotness at best.

And the last one -- these are in no particular order -- comes from Cosmopolitan:

That's Colin Allred, of the Tennessee Titans, and Cosmo said they picked him because "The 27-year old is originally from Texas, where everything’s bigger. We’re talking about his biceps..."

By the way, the picture at the top of the post is Eliza Kruger; she's the 17-year-old Mark Sanchez dated for a while.


Stephen Hayes said...

No wonder Mrs. Chatterbox loves her football!

Michael Offutt, Tebow Cult Initiate said...

Wow. This is my favorite post that you've ever done.

Rusty Webb said...

Wookies! Dammit. How many points was this one?

Andrew Leon said...

Please, tell me you own X-Men: First Class.

Lela Stepanoska said...

The Highest Paid NFL Players