Friday, February 20, 2009

Debuting The MiniBest!

The 30... make that 20... things "The Scream" is Screaming.

The 28... make that 23... Best Xmas Songs, Plus Santas and other Stuff.

The 15... make that FOUR... Best Summer Movies.

The Six Best Things I Didn't Know I Wanted Until I Saw Them On TV.

The 13... make that 8... Best World Records (You Wouldn't Think Would Be World Records.)

The 10... make that 7... Best Underrated Instruments.

The 30... Make That 23... Best Things About Summer.

February, 2009: The Best Songs By One-Hit Wonders (That Aren't Their One Hit.)

a-ha: "The Sun Always Shines On TV."

Men Without Hats: "Pop Goes The World."

Beck: "He's A Mighty Good Leader."

March, 2009: Best Foods Shaped Like Other Things:


Disney's Hydroponics.

Butter Elvis.
Lenin Pops
April 2009: Nothing But New Stuff!
The Best New Species.
The Best New Food.

May 2009: The Best Jobs For Brett Favre When He Finally Doesn't Play Football Anymore!

UV Monitor, South Pole.

Not Being A Spy In Iran

Manager of "Cave of the Winds"

June, 2009: The Best Ad Jingles:

Oscar Mayer Bologna

Dr Pepper: I'm A Pepper
Big Mac Ingredients


Pepsi Streamline

Rolling Stones: Rice Krispies.
July, 2009: The Best Parts Of Songs
"I Don't Care" (From No More Kings)

The piano in November Rain by Guns & Roses

The Background Voices in Fibber Island, They Might Be Giants

August, 2009: The Best Comic Book Characters I'm Pretty Sure Only I Remember.
Element Lad.

'Mazing Man
Syzygy Darklock
Nanny Dickering

September, 2009: The Best ACTUAL Horror Monsters.

Those freaky weird other-dimensional monsters from The Mist.
The Blair Witch
The Chattering Cenobite

The Jeeper Creeper
October, 2009: The Best Strange Movie Roles.
Prison Inmate Sitting Behind Henry
Jack Nicholson, Michael Jackson, Bob Dylan, and Frank Sinatra (but not all in one movie.)

November & December, 2009: The Best Alli Millstein Songs.

We interrupt the villainy to introduce Alli.

Song one: Our Love Is Underground.

Song two: Mend My Heart (with an update here.)

Song Three: "Skeletons."

December 2009: More Christmas Songs:
Everybody Loves Christmas
It's The Little Things
Merry Christmas, Everyone

February 2010: The Best Impossible Sports Stories.
Mutual Fund Executive Beats Michael Jordan In One-On-One
Man surfs 12.5 km, upriver -- and there were probably man-eating fish there.

April, 2010:
The Best Songs That Are Impossibly Catchy And Hard To Get Out Of Your Head.
Seven Nation Army.

Broadway musical songs (Reader Nomination!)

Poker Face.

Making Love (Out of Nothing At All)

May 2010: The Best Foods That Never Existed.

Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster

Fizzy Lifting Drink.

What's a "MiniBest?"What it sounds like: A "Best" that's not accompanied by all the frou frou of all these other lists and Whodathunkits? and meandering lengthy essays that could benefit from some severe editing (or medication. Either one.)

I like to write, and I especially like writing on here, but creating those longer posts takes time and every now and then I'm expected to work/parent/be a productive member of society, and because of those expectations, I don't get to write on here as often as I could.

To help fill the void in between those lengthier posts, I've decided to institute "The MiniBest," which will be a periodic "Best" nomination interspersed throughout the others. Each month will have a "MiniBest" theme.

Claudius' path to the stars was lit with hope... but paved in blood. Read Eclipse, the haunting tale of one man's doomed attempt to escape.
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