The Pop Culture Graph: Christmas Songs You've Decided To Hate, Now.

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The five songs which dropped the MOST this week, according to Billboard, on the holiday charts, and how many places they fell:

Is this one of those dead-people-sing-with-people-we've-forgotten mashups? I've never even heard this song.  Cyndi Lauper is still alive and well, apparently?  She's worth $6,000,000, according to this site, or about 1/20th or what Miley Cyrus is worth.

That's right.

Here is the only thing I know about Michael Buble: once, when VH1 had that "Best Week Ever" show, these two comedians looked at a picture of Michael Buble sleeping and compared him to a body pillow, saying "My Michael Buble sleep number is..."

I've never forgotten that.  It's been like 10 years and everytime I hear "Michael Buble" I think "My Michael Buble sleep number is..." 

This is the original song, from the animated feature.  You know what would make a great animated feature? The series of comics being put on by Dinosaur Comics the past week or so, re-imagining Christmas traditions as monster/spy type movies:

I love Dinosaur Comics.


You should, too.

Who is Martina McBride?  Why do I know her name but cannot tell you anything about her? We live in weird times.

Trivia about this song: It was first performed in the movie The Lemon Drop Kid, released in March. Wikipedia says it was inspired by a bell on a desk of the songwriter, so way to put in those extra hours, Euterpe.*

*The muse of lyric song.

It was originally called Tinkle Bells, but the wife of a writer of a song reminded the writer that tinkle is a euphemism for urination.

I used to kind of like the swingin' Elvis Presley version of this song.  Do you have to say Presley with Elvis if you mean Elvis Presley?  I don't think so.  I think that if you say Elvis without specifying, you should be taken to mean Elvis Presley and if you mean any other Elvis you should then specify.  Let's make that a rule.

HENCEFORTH IT SHALL BE A RULE.

I bet you're wondering who said that.  I've got connections.

Here's a famous Elvis for you: Elvis of Munster.

St. Elvis, called St. Ailbe in his native tongue, was born to a slave who had an affair with the king.  The king ordered him killed but the man who was supposed to kill the baby Elvis instead gave him to a she-wolf, who raised him until some Britons took him in.  But the Britons refused to take Elvis back to Britain with them when they left -- apparently they were on holiday and took in a kid, you know how you always buy impractical souvenirs -- and he grew up to become a bishop.  Before he died, he set sail on a supernatural ship that had come for him, which took him to learn "the secret of his death." He then returned and died.  Wikipedia doesn't say how, so let your imagination run wild.**

**I'm going to say "He died while flying a nuclear weapon away from New York City." That seems to be popular this year.