Sunday, July 04, 2010

The 30 Best Things About Summer, 19

19. Carnival Midways (after dark).

I've always loved carnival midways -- the rides, the games, the foods dipped in chocolate and then deep-fried and then dipped in more chocolate and then powdered. But based on my childhood and what my parents taught me, there are two things to keep in mind about carnivals:

1. They're death traps. If you even go near one of those rides, you'll have your head lopped off by a crossbar. (This message brought to you by my mom.)

2. During the day, they look shoddy. You can see all the crummy workmanship on the rides, the flaming-cobra tattoos (on the ladies; the men's are worse), and the junky prizes look like junky prizes.

But at night, the flashing lights and Ferris (Death trap) Wheel neon and all the rest hide the ugly and make for a magical world. One that will still kill you if you go near a ride -- but in a magical way.

Other Best Things About Summer:

8. Helium balloons.

9. Jell-O

10. Shorts.

11. Hammocks.

12. Longer days.

13. Sandals.

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