The Best Spoken Word Song

I was driving to pick up The Boy the other day, and it was a rather long drive. I took the Babies along and played music as we drove, singing along with it, as is my usual style. In rapid succession, a couple of songs came on that are not so much singing as they are speaking, and I 'sang' those to the Babies!. The songs were, in this order, "Common People," then "Walk on The Wild Side."

Yes, I sang both to the Babies! I don't believe in coddling kids. If they have to hear about Holly from Miami, F-L-A, it's better that they hear it from their dad. Plus, they don't understand the words. They're only 18 months old. My nephew, who's now 16 and turned out mostly okay, used to love the song "Diz Knee Land" by Dada, because of the chorus: I'm going to Diz knee land. But it's about the grimmest song you could ever hear:




That nephew also liked the Jimmy Buffett song that had "We're off to see the lizard" as a chorus. I cannot find the CD for that song! No matter how hard I try! And if I search for it on Youtube I come up with something called "A Lady who turned into LIZARD, a fact that can never CHANGE!" which is horrifying and weird:



But my experience in the car the other day gave me the idea for this category, which is actually a lot more broad than you might think. Because there are a lot of spoken word songs. So I'll list some finalists in this category and rate them:

First up is Baz Luhrman's "Everybody's Free To Wear Sunscreen:"



I like this one a lot -- it's full of great advice, and the music sort of lulls you into a sense of tranquility that I usually only get during pose 12 of "Yoga for Dummies" on Sundays (and not even then, much, as the Babies! like to join in Yoga and by "join in" I mean "sit on my head.")

And this one has an urban legend associated with it -- everyone thinks it's a graduation speech by someone famous. It's not. But the advice still is great, and brings a little bit of a lump to my throat thinking about the future when I listen to it.

But it's not The Best.

In the "advice-and-cool music" realm, still, there's "Common People" by William Shatner -- who embodies cool.



And I love this song. I love how Shatner speaks it, I love the message of it, I love the guitar, I love the chorus, this song jazzes me up and gets me up on my feet and makes me want to do something active and exciting and makes me proud to be one of the Common People.

But it's not The Best.

I mentioned "Walk On The Wild Side," and so here it is:



Old school spoken-word rock & roll, and mellow and cool as a Saturday afternoon drowsing on the couch listening to traffic go by. And, again, the great chorus: do, do do do do, do-do-do... well, I can't type it. Lou Reed creates some great characters here and tells a couple of interesting little vignettes, and every college student who ever existed discovers this song, then discovers Velvet Underground, then grows up and gets a job with the memory of what cool is and a longing to Walk On The Wild Side.

But it's not The Best.

I would be remiss if I didn't throw in one of my favorite Spoken Word songs, and one The Boy also likes now: "The Trial," by Pink Floyd:



This one is more theatrical than the others -- it's part of the larger story of The Wall. And it's got a grand scope and good story itself. And, again, the chorus is haunting and beautiful.

But it's not The Best.

Spoken word songs often feature a great chorus of singing in the background, to add a musical touch to what would otherwise be a poem. Like the chorus in "Long Long Time" by Guy Forsyth:



Here's the thing about this song. I have it on my iPod and I have no idea how it got there. I don't even know who Guy Forsyth is-- but I know he sounds a lot like me, especially the part about finding religion in comic books and Star Wars movies. I drew vipers, not airplanes, but the rest is pretty much me. (Except that I feel fine. Sorry, Guy.)

But "Long Long Time," too, is not The Best.

The Best Spoken Word Song is "Cheesecake Truck" by King Missile.



I first heard this song when it was the interlude music during a scene change in a play I was in, "Brother Truckers," about some murderous garbage men. (I had a dual role: I played the maid and the district attorney. It was that kind of play. I only was in it because one summer I was bored and decided I wanted to try acting, so I tried out for a bunch of plays and got the small roles in this one, which played four straight days at a real theater in Milwaukee.)(So I am famous and will sign autographs if you ask nicely.)

That was in 1994 or 1995. The director of the play didn't know the name of the song or who sang it; we used only a snippet in the show. After that, I always remembered that song and its bouncy theme music and hilarious story, but could never find it.

Then, in 1998 or 1999, Sweetie went through the heroic effort of tracking down the CD the song was on and ordering it -- this was before iTunes, before the Internet was universally available (she had to use her boss' computer). And she surprised me with it on Christmas morning -- it's still the best gift I've ever been given, because it's (a) a cool song and (b) it showed that Sweetie listens to me when I ramble on about my past.

So "Cheesecake Truck" has it all: great music, funny story with perhaps a hidden meaning, plus it has sentimental value in that "Cheesecake Truck" above all other songs serves to remind me how lucky I am to have Sweetie.

Here's an alternate version of "Cheesecake Truck" just for good measure:




And no Spoken Word Song compilations would be complete without a little Rocketman:



And here's someone else who knows a little something about being cool:



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